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Fort Taylor Pyrate Invasion Nov/Dec 2012 - Key West, FL
Chapter 11th: Sunday battle - Kind of like the Saturday battle, only the other way around; The surgeon's observations of what happened on the fort wall; Details on what Michelle and Wendy did to excite the crowd up there watching the battle; Of the battle cannon fire; What the troops did when they ran out of powder for the cannons; How Crudbeard reconciled himself to his troops dying and How the battle ended. But first, another word from our sponsor.
Photo: Don Dunbar
Stynky Thinking - And That Means Trouble
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"This all seems so familiar to me. Whoa! My inner voice! What happened to the echo -echo...cho...o. Ha ha! That joke never gets old. So this reminds me of that night I was wading through the tropical foliage located along the northwestern corner of Guam - provided Guam has tropical foliage, that is - when I saw this guy strolling along, following his shadow in the sand on a starry moonless night. It was Mission! Oh, how I love to torture him! So I jogged up and begged him to give me a hit off his bottle of 20 y.o. Glenmorangie that he was swigging. Then I shared stories of my fictional storied life in the Philippines, where I fought with the rebel forces in the... oh, wait. That wasn't me. That was Brig! Brig is always doing the shopping at her Avis store, which is how you are finding the best echolocational equipments in the whole of Guam and the Philopots and also your best Kewpie doll hairs. Avis!"
Photo: Diane Mueller
Wendy, Mission and Michelle on the Fort Wall, Confusing the Tourists
With the pig sawing complete, Devlin and I trudged up the circular stairs to the fort wall to watch the battle. I actually climbed up on the fort wall for a bit to hang out with Michelle Murillo and Wendy Wellman who were encouraging the crowd to yell enlightened things like "Hit... a... Brit!" Scarlett Jai appeared on the wall shortly after that and I realized that I was out of my league when it came to inciting the public and sheepishly got back down off the wall.
 Photo: Don Dunbar A View of the Fort Wall From the Battlefield. I see five easy targets, how about you? (William, Chad and I on the right - not easy targets.) |
Photo: Stolen
"This is the most potent weapon in war! The fighting spirit is in this bottle!"
While we were all up there waiting for the British to arrive, the photographers were scurrying around the battlefield, collecting clever photographs like squirrels going after nuts in the late fall. Among the images were several of pirates drinking deep before the battle. Now, of course, as all you impressionable youth are concerned, pirates would never, ever drink before a battle. As far as you know.
No, all kidding aside, these images show people drinking water. At least that's what they told me they were drinking. We have enough problems with the park service without having drunken reenactors firing weapons. There's really no need for anyone to be drinking before battle. Besides which it probably violates the Geneva Convention or something. Plus there are consequences to drinking too much during a battle as can be seen in the last photo below.
 Photo: Don Dunbar Pearl and the Fighting Spirit |
 Photo: Mission The Jolly Rover and the Fighting Spirit |
 Photo: Stolen"Did you miss me? I guess NOT!" |
There was quite a large crowd on the fort wall to see the battle today so I stood back with William Red Wake and Chad Azevedo and watched the unruly mob of tourists. We were also guiding people to stay away from our side of the fort wall because there were a small group of pirates hanging out about 20 or 30 feet away from us with their guns at the ready.
 Photo: Mission The Unruly Crowds, Sitting on the Fort Wall |
 Photo: MissionWilliam Eyes Freya Suspiciously (And With Good Reason) |
Photo: Don Dunbar
Gareth Takes the Field
The British came marching formally across the water-side of the field to assume their position opposite the
Photo: Mission
British march in front of Jolly Rover II
pirates. Since this is where the pirates were yesterday, I took it to mean that the attacking group had to be along the water. This meant that the boats, all of which were stocked with pirates, were behind the British and they would, technically, be fighting a two-sided battle. (Those of you who know your battle tactics will recognize this as being the classic "We're In Deep Doodoo" fighting strategy.)
This did not phase Third (Day) Army Commander Gareth, who was heard to mutter about pirate Field Marshall Crudbeard, "You magnificent bastard... I read your book!" This confused pirate Field Marshall Crudbeard given that he didn't know how to write. Ha ha! Another example of those Brits and their dry sense of humor!
 Photo: Don Dunbar British Line Marching to the Field - Youngblood Drumming |
 Photo: Don DunbarThe Brits March Along the Waterside to Their Position |
Since I was behind the crowds, I didn't really see much of the battle, but what I did see was that the British were lined up nice and neat along the water facing the fort and the pirates were opposite them along the fort wall. You can see the two lines below. First the British line.
 Photo: Don Dunbar "The British Fighting Line for the Sunday Battle. Ready for your inspection, sah!" |
And then there was the pirate line - the pirates could not all be gotten into a line, so we'll have to use two photos.
 Photo: Don Dunbar Archangels form a sort of line. |
 Photo: Don Dunbar*sigh* The only way to get some pirates to form a line... |
Photo: Don Dunbar
The British Fire at the Offending (& Offensive) Pirates With Help From The Owl
Someone started the cannon fire - I imagine it was the Brits, but I don't really know. Then the battle went back and forth for awhile with the ring of cannon fire. Because of the way the cannons were positioned, the sound reverberated like crazy . It made for some very dramatic cannon fire, which was nice for the crowds.
I was later talking with Edward/Keith about the sound improvement and he said it was awesome for the pirates too. The Brigands had been playing in the sally port while they were setting up the battle earlier and the sound bounced off the wall in the sally port and projected music over to the battle field.
 Photo: Poppa Ratsey The Dramatic Brit Mortar Fire |
 Photo: Don DunbarThe Archangels Return British Fire in View of the Fort Wall. |
Photo: Don Dunbar
The All Girl's Cannon Crew Firing Their Weapon
Photo: Don Dunbar
Sandi Bilbo on the Cannon
For the first time that I can remember since 2009, there was an All Girl's Cannon Crew at the event.
If I had to guess, I'd say this All Girls Cannon team was led (in spirit, if not in fact) by Sandi Bilbo. I say 'guess,' because I never saw them together as a group myself.
 Photo: Don Dunbar The All Girl's Cannon Crew Pose With the Cannon |
 Photo: Don Dunbar"Is he dead?" "I sure as hell hope so! Then we can take the cannon!" |
Photo: Diane Mueller
They Left Jack All Alone....
Meanwhile, off to the side, Jack Roberts was standing there, his cannon at the ready and... doesn't anyone want to play with Jack? Fine! He'll just take his cannon and go home!
Actually, I always like to check in with Jack and see what he's doing because he's so good at building things. He told me that for him 2012 was the Year of Canvas. (I do recall one of those news blog sites announcing that 2012 would, in fact, be the Year of Canvas, come to think of it.) Jack purchased a wall tent and made himself a fly using nothing but a fishing rod, two buttons and bit of packing twine. I asked him for any stories from the World of Jack, which resulted in:
Jack And His Canvas
"One of my favorite things to do before an event is making repairs or checking out the canvas. [What with it being the Year of Canvas, we can all appreciate this.] Setting up the Wall tent or the Fly in the front yard is always a head turner.
I get the same response from the neighbors every time. Cars slow waaaay down just to figure out what’s going on.
It's also fun to wash the clothes, in a period correct fashion, and hang them out to dry. In the front yard. Same thing if I set up my replica Royal Navy hammock. The neighbors must think we're crazy."
Jack is all about details. He told me that his focus for 2013 is going to be creating crates. "We need crates. They are going to look so much better than the "Rubbermaid" bins with canvas over them. The plan is to make them out of cedar to keep the weight down." I wonder what sort of emblem he'll put on them? I appreciate well thought out, yet still interesting period-style company emblems. (No, I don't want to know what my neighbors think of me and my interests, thank you very much.)
Back on the battlefield, the British and Pirates were burning through their powder firing at each other.
 Photo: Don Dunbar The British Fire at the Pirates with the Mortar in Front of the Owl |
 Photo: Don DunbarThe Pirates Return the Favor By Firing at the British |
Photo: Don Dunbar
"Dress that line, mister!"
Eventually both sides ran out of powder for their cannons and so they ceased firing them. This meant that people could advance onto the field, although we still had the "no sword fighting" rule. (This did kind of stink, as I have hinted in a previous battle chapter, but to be quite honest, you really can't see much of what's going on in the sword fights from the fort wall anyhow. So it was not quite the tragedy it might have been.)
Since there could be no sword fighting, the British got into an organized line and then advanced towards the rag-tag group of pirates, moving step by step, firing their small arms. People started dropping on the pirate side. (It's kind of funny how they fire all those cannons and no one ever gets wounded until they switch to the notoriously fiddly and inaccurate small arms.)
The pirates were getting the worst of the battle at this point, probably because they didn't actually have any small arms today. You know, it's only fair - give the pirates all the small arms on Friday and then give them to the British on Sunday.
 Photo: Don Dunbar The British Line Advances Towards the Pirates Into Battle |
 Photo: MissionThe Owl and the Adirondack Watch the Battlefield Melee |
Photo: Diane Mueller
A Confluence of Ships
While the British were marching formally across the field few of them dropped. Someone – I believe it was Gareth - noted that the British decided that
Photo: Mission
Michelle Directing the Wave from the Fort Wall
they shouldn't fall because the pirates had no weapons and it wouldn't make sense. (Meanwhile, up on the fort wall, no one was noticing who did and didn't drop. Everyone was looking at Scarlett, Michelle and Wendy and yelling that inane phrase about hitting Brits.)
Gareth further said it suddenly occurred to them that there were pirates firing from the ships behind them, so they could logically die. And die some of them did. (Meanwhile, up on the fort wall, Michelle and Wendy were leading the crowd in doing the wave along the wall.)
 Photo: Mission British on the Battlefield with the Owl |
 Photo: Don DunbarThe British Decide That It's OK to Have Some Wounded |
Photo: Poppa Ratsey
The Four Snipermen (& Woman) of the Apocalypse
This went on for a awhile and then the moment finally arrived for the three people in the corner of the fort wall that we were guarding from the public to fire their pieces.
Photo: Poppa Ratsey
Scarlett Jai Putting Her Right Arm In
I wish I had been paying more attention to this so I could have snapped a picture of this, but I had joined the crowd who were being led by Scarlett, Michelle and Wendy in a round of the hokey-pokey.
Once the shot was fired, all the Brits went down in a heap and the crowd started cheering (in between putting their whole selves in and then taking their whole selves out.) The pirates had won thanks to the four Snipermen (and Woman) of the Battlefield Apocalypse! Huzzah! (Actually, the pirates were all dead except the four Snipermen (and Woman) of the Battlefield Apocalypse, but I suppose that is winning. In a way.)
 Photo: Don Dunbar British All Defeated (Except One) |
 Photo: Don DunbarPirates All Defeated (Except None) |
Photo: Borrowed
Daffy Shows Porky How to Get His Indian Suit
Or is that what really happened after all? Hmm? I want you to take a moment and go back up and look through all those battle pictures and see if you notice anything... reappearing... in them? Like in the background. Go ahead, I'll wait here.
Well? You didn't even go look, did you? C'mon, now! You'll wanna get your Indian suit, don't you? GO BACK AND LOOK! (Sheesh.)
Photo: Caribbean Pearl
Keith Iritsky
While I'm waiting for you, let me amuse myself by telling no one (because you're all somewhere above looking... right? RIGHT?) one final battlefield story I heard. It seems that Keith Iritsky got the idea to die dramatically by falling upon one of the battlefield cannons. So, no doubt with all sorts of stumbling flourishes, chewing the leafy scenery, he collapsed on a cannon.
The Viceroy, seeing this, and being a bit of a dramatic guy himself, decided HE wanted to die on the cannon, so he stumbled around, no doubt twice as long as Keith did, and then pushed Keith off so he could arrange himself as you see below. That Viceroy! Such a card! Always concerned about the welfare of his men!
 Photo: Don Dunbar The Viceroy Coming to What Appears to Be an Uncomfortable Demise - Right After Shoving Keith Off |
So, did you find the recurring element in the battleground photos? No? (What good are ya' anyhow?)
It was the Owl! The Owl kept popping up in all the battlefield images above! See it now? (Oh, sure it's obvious now that I pointed it out to you.) This is because it was the Owl, not the four Snipermen (and Woman) of the Battlefield Apocalypse which actually cleared the field and won the battle! The four Snipermen (and Woman) of the Battlefield Apocalypse just happened to fire at the right time.
Not only that, but the Owl also took several shots at the battlefield "art" before it began it's battle field clearing run! So let's have three cheers for the hero of the Sunday battle - the Owl! Hip hip... huzzah! Hip hip... huzzah! Hip hip... HUZZAH!
 Photo: Rachel Siegel The Owl Attacks the Silly Battlefield Art |
 Photo: Rachel SiegelThe Owl Leaves No Survivors! |
 Photo: Don Dunbar The Owl in a Hero Shot |