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Pirates in Paradise 2008 - Key West, Fl

Chapter 10th - The conquistadors are mentioned, even though their whole routine was left out of the on-line surgeon's journal because Mission didn't even know it happened; the last black powder firing to celebrate the sunset is detailed; the class pictures are shot and documented; dinner is delayed by the start of the auction; dinner gets cold; the auction is finally put on hold; dinner is served; the auction continues; the air gets cold; Stynky finds surgeon Mission and begins that horrific element that set up the disaster of last year's meeting - mead; the hanging occurs so Mission must rush to find his bone saw; Mission gives the rest of the mead to Jessi, much to Stynky's disappointment. (And that's just too bad now, isn't it?)

12-7-08 Evening, Pre- Chaos, Sometime after the third battle, Willie Wobble (below left), William (2nd from left) & Doug (last) apparently brought conquistador outfits for some reason and decided to work with Deadeye (third from left below) to frame Captain Spike and try him for piracy or something like that (below right). To be honest, I wasn't there, but fortunately Captain Sophia was. She recounts the whole thing in her journal quite well. Check it out!

The Conquistadors Crew (Photo: Thatchers) The conquistadors capture Captain Spike (Photo: Sophia)

Cannon at sunset
(Photo: Jessica Bagley)
The Viceroy directs the firing of his mortar
(Photo: Jessica Bagley)
When I got back to the campsite, almost everyone had gone down to the fort to take photos or fire their pieces to salute the sunset. So I trundled down to the fort as quick as I could. It was a terrific sunset of reds, purples, oranges and all the various other colors that lie in-between. Several musket and cannon shot were fired and they ended by firing a new cannon that hadn't been used in a long time. We were all warned that it was an old piece and might explode. The slow fuse was lit and everyone backed away. But the little cannon performed admirably and shot its black powder load toward the disappearing orb.

The PiP Pyracy Pub Crew
(Photo: "Poppa Ratsey" Callahan, Callahan Digital Art)

We all kind of milled around after that. We were supposed to meet before 7pm to take the pub photo, but several people had gone back to the encampment to change for the hanging the Archangels planned by way of entertainment. By the time everyone got back, it was after 7. Tony Callahan got a shot of the pub members in front of the huge brown banner William Red Wake made last year (at left). Then someone yelled for everyone to pose and we got a huge group shot. I know many people had to leave, but there must have been 60 or 70 people in that photo. When those photos were finished, Tony said, "Is that it? Or do we have to do some crew crap?" Everyone started laughing and broke pose and wandered off the stage.


The pyracy pub flag with cover flowing
(Photo right: Jessica Bagley)
Captain Jim then started the seamen's chest auction with Spike acting as auctioneer. It's a good thing because Jim's voice sounded pretty well blown from all the yelling earlier in the week. Spike was a natural and several items went for a surprising amount of money. However the food crew began making noises about the food getting cold, which became more strident as the auction went on. So Spike finally said the rest of the auction would take place after dinner and the huge snake-like line formed. Captain Jim, Patrick and I were recruited to lower the sheets for the slide show to occur later and since the line seemed to extend out the fort entrance anyhow, we agreed. Climbing the winding fort stairs at any time is interesting, but it is doubly so in the dark! (See the long dinner line in the foreground and Pat and I behind the sheets above the banner in the rear.)

Feeling suitably chivalrous for our pitching in, Patrick and I joined the line. The food was good, although it probably would have been even better had it been warm. (But at least we were feeling chivalrous.)

Below left: Cascabel either guarding or sneaking the food before dinner was officially served. Below right: Archangel crew eating dinner Sunday under the huge tarp. This is another rare shot of Mark Diamond (sitting next to Madam Grace who is sitting next to Dutch and Josh). Why is it that all the photos of Mark feature him eating?

Cascabel at the Sunday buffet (Photo: Jessica Bagley) Mark Diamond and Grace dining (Photo: Fayma Callahan, Callahan Digital Art)

After dinner the seamen's chest auction continued with the Viceroy acting the part of auctioneer. Eventually someone managed to dig Spike out of the pub (which was the warmest place in the fort – it was a nippy night) and he finished the auction. I bought a mahogany box that was donated while we were all standing there from a local island artisan for $25. Willie Wobble provided one of his rope-wrapped onion skin bottles which fetched $45 I believe. So, despite my best efforts to photograph the contents of the chest, so many items were added during the auction that I didn't get photos of it all. The proceeds of the auction were to go to the Friends of Fort Taylor, who help sponsor the event.

Below left: the Dead Man's chest as I found it on Saturday afternoon. Many generous donations were made after this photo. Below center: Spike and Captain Jim auctioneering. Below right: A potential bidder checking out the merchandise, as presented by Vanna Brig.

The Dead Man's actual chest (Photo: Mission) Auctioneers Spike and Captain Jim (Photo: Mission) Brig presents an item to an audience member (Photo: Mission)

Stynky looking falsely innocent
(Photo: Madam Grace)
Sometime during dinner, Stynky stole my Patrick Hand original hat which I had left propped up against a tent pole while I ate. I found this out from someone who shall remain nameless because I sure don't recall their name. During the auction, Stynky slunk in behind me. Now he is many things, one of them being a terrible liar, so he finally had to give up and admit my hat was in his car. He sheepishly explained that he had planned to call my cell phone with a ransom demand and then slunk off to retrieve it. (I thought I needed it for the skit. I was wrong.)

Right: Do not trust this man. He only looks innocent.

Mission and Stynky toast you from the pub
(Photo: Jessica Bagley)
"Take what you can!" "Give nothin' back!"
Having resolved any hat difficulties, we then proceeded to the pub and purchased a bottle of mead to sit in the warmth and contemplate life, the Pyracy Pub and the fact that we were missing the end of the auction. Halfway through the bottle of mead, someone came in to announce that the Locks for Love hair cutting was taking place. Had Stynky's phone not warbled, we probably would have missed that too. (Mead is yummy.) Stynky hit upon the idea of taking the bottle with us, so I duly took it and he headed outside to call the person who had called him back. (It turned out to be Braze, who was standing somewhere in the fort outside the pub. They probably were on opposite sides of the same tent phoning each other.) I ran into Red Jessi in the auction crowd and gave her a healthy slug of the mead. (Much to Stynky's later chagrin.)


I had Mary's camera, so I took several pictures of the shearing of the locks. I'm told Patrick washed his hair yesterday morning in preparation for the cutting, a PiP first. (Well, that's what someone said.) Patrick looked even more steampunk afterwards. They had apparently auctioned the right to cut the hair off as well. Mae and Brig cut Patrick's hair, Edward O'Keefe cut Lily's hair and Spike cut M.A. d'Dogge's hair. Someone said that Spike paid $100 for that right, Edward paid $90 to cut Lily's hair (and he looked pretty damned nervous) and either Mae and Brig or some anonymous donor contributed $65 to cut Patrick's hair.

Below: The Locks of Love haircutting saga. From left: The twins Mae & Brig cut Patrick Hand's hair. Center: Edward O'Keefe with Lily Alexander's locks. Right: Spike hacking off M.A. d'Dogges hair.

Patrick getting his locks trimmed for Locks of Love (Photo: Mission) Edward holds his trophy - Lily's cut off braid (Photo: Mission) Spike hacks at M.A. d'Dogges hair for Locks of Love (Photo: Mission)

The women gather round Lilly
(Photo: Nicole Andreyko, Callahan Digital Art)
The hanging skit then began. The skit came off quite well. I thought sure that it wouldn't because it was nippy and it was so long after dinner, but they somehow managed to clear the pub ("Free rum, outside!") and a large crowd gathered to watch. Somewhere after it started, your poor ship's surgeon realized his bit in this skit involved using the bone saw, which was sitting at the other end of the fort in the Callahan's tent. So I made a mad, mead-filled dash to the fort entrance and back. Kids, do not run with large bone saws no matter how much mead you drink. The ship's surgeon is a professional.

When I got back. Lilly McKinney was just being introduced as the secondary distraction story about the captain's pregnant mistress. She called for a midwife and a surgeon which is where I staggered on set drunkenly, one sock up and the other down and said something like, "Here's the ship's surgeon! What needs to be cut off?" at which Lily squealed and Silkie sent me away.

Captain Sterling handing around in the fort.
Callahan Digital Art)
Meanwhile, back inside the fort, the Captain was being put into the harness while everyone watched Lilly. I believe Hamish was supposed to play the part of the infant, but the skit started after Hamish's bed time. Attention was then turned back to the Captain and the hanging performed. Dutch, playing someone named Robbie (Whose backstory is not very clear to me.) tries to save the Captain while someone else steals his shoes. It was a very effective skit and had a lot more comedy than I'm explaining because I couldn't hear a lot of it. The hanging was downright spooky looking and I've no doubt that the Captain's ghost will haunt the place for ever more. ("Yellow fever! Yellow fever!") At least he will haunt it until next year when he returns for PiP '09. I missed a lot of the end of this because I didn't want to carry the bone saw back into the pub, so I trotted back to the other end of the fort and stowed it in the Callahan's tent again.

Left: The spooky hanging of Captain Sterling...

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